Why this matters “A family is a risky venture, because the greater the love, the greater the loss… That’s the trade-off." And so today, in 2018
Why this matters
“A family is a risky venture, because the greater the love, the greater the loss… That’s the trade-off.”
And so today, in 2018, I choose to get a little personal, if you will allow me, and in a moment, you will know why. Because this involves my mum [more correctly my parents], whereas they may not have consciously been aware [like you and I, perhaps, will shortly], they introduced me and my siblings to the world of family rituals. And for which I am eternally grateful. And whereas I started off this post thinking I would just share one such ritual. I’m however inclined now to perhaps cite a couple. Please bear with me. Will you?
Our family, like yours, has all kinds of rituals we perform with our ourselves, and with our children. Some are handed down. Most we started. A few may live on for our future [and hypothetical] grandchildren, and great-grand-children……
What are Family Rituals?
A family ritual is that naturally occurring family activity, which has a symbolic meaning for your family. Like I shared in #020 Family Business 101, in the evenings, Aunty Baby and I watch news, and we also use the occasion to bond and catch-up on other activities. Note that while a family dinner every Friday night may be a routine. A periodic family dinner at a fancy location for Mom’s birthday [or family participating in an activity she loves in her honour] may be a ritual or tradition. For instance, my Mum has a passion for netball, having been the Kenya National Netball coach, and won several regional trophies. And so, for the last seven years, we have sponsored an annual national netball tournament – and that…. that’s …another story.
You could simply;
“Take a family routine, ….. add special meaning ……and a sense of what it means to your family, and you have a ritual. Dinner + shared prayer or reflection = ritual.”
Just to mention a few; I believe you tell stories, sing and read books to your kids, then teach them a life lesson from the story before they go to bed. That too is a ritual. We have weekly “movie nights,” like we did the block buster movie “Black Panther” [read more on this #018 Family Business 101].
Holidays also come with their own set of personalized rituals and traditions, whether it’s the annual larger family meeting, at a specific symbolic location, or the “just-for-just-party” [an invention and branding of unscheduled bonding sessions by a sister-in-law] or the scheduled quarterly “eat-greet-and-catch-up-get-together informing family members of important happenings in the family. Perhaps just having joint family experiences such attending events such as engagethat focus on the power of engagement to foster learning and transform hearts, minds and lives. The bucket of opportunities is inexhaustible.
News – a Family Ritual thanks to Mum and Dad
I promised, didn’t I. Ehrrr now, you see, Mama and Aburu inspired us, with a ritual they maintain today, of still keeping up with the news and knowing what happens world over. During our childhood, Saturday evenings begun with BBC [News Hour Program] and Radio RSA. Then there was this very popular song. which I wish to share with you, and whose lyrics qualify for #musicthatmoves. Andrew my kid bro sang it, I sang it….and it has stuck with me over the years. I didn’t know then, like I do now, the lyrics of this song by Franklin Boukaka which I’d love you [and I] to hear at #safaricomAt5 with Manu Dibango #safaricomjazz@5 today. I wonder whether my parents knew the words. You bet they did!
Click here, sit back and enjoy the song – Le Bucheron – Franklin Boukaka
Whatever you do, I trust that you will make your family rituals, new and old, fun and memorable. If you do, I promise you, that you will get “generational bonga points” through benefits such as transmitting to the NextGen increased literacy, awareness, appreciation, happiness, compassion if not loads of wisdom. But they can also just be fun, as you transmit deep seated values.
I kept my word, Didn’t I?
Our target as experts in family-owned enterprises, is to drop the bucket further down the well deeper than anybody else AND to support you understand and tackle the really deep-seated issues that make families and their family-owned businesses thrive for generations. If your need to talk we are here to listen and provide you with solutions. .………over to you………